The President Bush Report
by: Daniel Riehs
WASHINGTON—Sources close to President Bush recently announced that the President is getting good at checking his watch at inappropriate times without being noticed.
Said an anonymous source, "He does it all the time: official state dinners, debates . . . I wouldn't be surprised if he tries to check his watch during the upcoming State of the Union Address."
Experts hypothesize that the President gets bored during many events and by checking his watch he can find out how much longer he has to be there.