Death Speaks Out Against Negative Image
by: Joe Morris
WASHINGTON—Death spoke out Friday in an exclusive interview about the negative and evil reputation he has acquired throughout the centuries.
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Above: Death, file photo. |
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"Everyone thinks I'm this awful person or something. It can really get to my sensitive, emotional side," Death said on CNN's Larry King Live. "Sometimes I'd just rather be dead."
"I can enjoy a nice conversation or skeletal massage every bit as much as the next guy. You try working everyday for the past 50,000 years and see if you don't get a little upset sometimes."
Death also spoke about hardships he's been enduring.
"The recent recession has been especially tough on me. I'm just trying to earn a decent living like everyone else," Death also told King. "You think this scythe and hooded-robe get-up is cheap? This is a Ralph Lauren original. And you've got no idea how much air conditioning can run you in the underworld."
Death concluded his interview by personally thanking the Chinese government, terrorists, and third-world countries for helping him through these difficult times.
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