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Volume 2, Issue 8 (October 1, 2003)
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Top Story

Poopie Dies Of Typhoid Fever

Poopie Dies Of Typhoid Fever

      CHIMNEY ROCK, Neb.—Poopie, the 6-year-old son of Snot and Boob died Tuesday of typhoid fever.

      Snot, a farmer from Illinois, left for Oregon in early April in search of a new and better life for his family.

      "I knew he was sick," Snot told reporters, "Why did I ignore the warning signs? We could have at least stopped to rest. . . . [Read Article]

Other News

Society:
Activists Still Confused About Execution Of Abortion Doctor's Killer

Politics:
Bustamante Desperate, Berating Schwarzenegger Through Fark Comments

Editorials

Bobby Craig:
Oh No, That's Fine. I don't Mind At All If You Use The Elevator To Go To The Second Floor. I Mean, You Are A 500-Pound Quadriplegic With An Irrational Fear Of Stairwells

Linus McFeely:
There Is Only One Way To Save The Women's United Soccer Association

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