I Won't Let My Son Get One Of Those Brain Implants
by: Freddy Pearce*
I'm sure you've heard of those newfangled brain implants that schools are encouraging students to get. Administrators think that by embedding computer chips in children's heads, they will suddenly become math whizzes who actually understands all the intricacies of algebra and calculus. Well, guess what—they won't. The chips do all the work, while our children get dumber and more technology dependent every day.
When I was in the third grade, every student was required to purchase a graphing calculator. We actually had to work out our computation problems by machine. We couldn't just think of a question and have the answer magically appear in our heads. Sure, the kids of today know that 7+4=11, but do they really understand why that's true? Real understanding of math can only be acquired by using a calculator. That's why I'm not letting my son get one of those brain implants.
Those teachers have been trying to pawn off their "new math" on me, but I won't give in. They try to give me crazy analogies about using calculators instead of pencils, but I won't listen. I know that if one of those implanted kids ever goes out without his chip, he won't be able to do any math. My child, however, will always have his calculator with him. A calculator is a gift that can't be taken away. Being able to solve equations and find derivatives on a calculator is a skill that will never become obsolete. It will serve my child for the rest of his life.
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*And by Freddy Pearce, we mean Daniel Riehs.
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