I Really Don't Know Why I Continue To Watch Homestar Runner Each Week
I remember there used to be a time—several months ago—when I would look forward to watching Homestar Runner. My friends and I would gather around a small computer screen every Monday evening and roar with laughter at the antics of Strong Bad, Marzipan, and Coach Z. My belief in the hilarity of the website was unquestioning, and my pride in being a Homestar Runner fan was unwavering. I wore my Strong Bad t-shirt with pride, and I could not imagine living my life in any other way.
Times were good. My life had a purpose. I could boldly refute the Homestar Runner detractors on Fark.com with an undeniable sincerity, without needing to really question my reasoning.
"You don't understand," I would tell them. "Some portions of Strong Bad's emails are made to be unfunny on purpose. If the emails were consistently witty, then one's choice to always watch them would be meaningless, robot-like, even."
But however steadfast my love for the grand creation of the brothers Chaps had been in the past, I knew that there would eventually come a time in my life when I would need to examine my true motivations through moments of honest introspection. And when I reached this point, I became bombarded with feelings of doubt, and my devotion to the cartoon began to waver.
Why, I asked myself, did I insist on watching the new email every Monday? I had long since abandoned the notion that a missed email would result in my internet privileges being taken away. Why couldn't I just watch the new emails as I pleased? Furthermore, why was it necessary to watch the emails in a group with my friends? Would I be any less of a fan if I watched them alone while sitting with my laptop under a shady tree? Who were these people to tell me when and where I could enjoy such internet hilarity?
And on the topic of hilarity, why couldn't I admit to myself that some of the web site's cartoons were simply not funny? Why couldn't I admit that anachronisms in the "old time" cartoons were simply products of fallible human beings, and not part of some grandiose message meant to be taken satirically?
I was watching, and I am continuing to watch, a weekly cartoon that has no relevance to my life, and that I only occasionally find funny anymore. Who do I have to thank for this situation?
Oh, to return to the days of a few months ago, when I truly loved Homestar Runner!
But this is impossible, and I know it is impossible, so today I just condemn myself to a life of disillusionment, a life where I watch a stupid cartoon every week out of habit, and I have long since forgotten why I still do it.
I really don't know why I continue to watch Homestar Runner each week.
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